I just wish for just one day, ONE DAY.. the drama would stop following you. And it could be just you and me. One on one. No text messeges every two seconds. No phone calls interupting. No nothing. Just me and you. After all. I am your. YOUR girlfriend. idiot.

..a kiss with a fist, is better than none..

update!

Week one in my new town at my new job.
I survived!!
Working with autistic children is definitely a different experience.
Something i thought would be a nice change from my normal job.
But wow.
Its similar in so many ways.
I can honestly say I love my new job.
Im catching on quite nicely and I will start night classes in January.(That is ALL paid for by my employer)
Living arrangements didnt quite work out the way I had planned.
But I have a sweet room in a monstrous house.
My parents are going to let me store my things at their place until I find a place of my own, which Im hoping to do come January or February.
(Right now Im living with my boss and her family, its actually really nice.. and Im comfortable in their home, which is a HUGE plus)

My relationship status?? Still taken. I am still seeing the same girl, my ginger.. although her hair is now black. And we are making things work while living in separate homes for the time being and I personally think thats best for our situation. I see her everyday on my lunch breaks. Lunch breaks involve sitting in the park with slurpee's, holding hands and talking.
She takes me out on dates usually every night.. so Im still quite spoiled with her. She even paid for my gas to drive back home this weekend for thanksgiving and to get more things to bring back "home".
We had a great start and a rocky patch, but things are getting better. And now that Im at my parents place, its hard to imagine ever even had lived apart from her.

My recovery! Im doing quite well to say the least! I was up and putsing around the day after my surgery. I was bound and determined not to let it keep me in bed like an invalid. I current have two scars. One on each hip bone. And the large incision is taking its time healing. Its ugly. And I'll have a nasty scar. But chicks dig scars.. right? :) (kidding).
Im working. Its only been just about 2 weeks post op. Which is kind of crazy. But Its all good. And Im doing well. Ginger likes my scars. So I guess we'll have to keep them!

All in all Im doing great. Im getting ready for halloween. I have 90% of costume. And Im so excited. Seriously. Im being a naughty cop and ginger is my in-mate. It fits perfectly for anyone who knows us in person, and the current "rocky" situation. ha. Shes great. :) Anyways.
I'll update when I can! Ciao!

..because if you play with fire you're gonna get burned..

im no longer strong enough to realize it will never change. crawling back i go, to promises of new beginnings. stronger love. and no more lies. i just want love. real love. i hope she'll understand.

..shame on you if you fool me once, shame on me if you fool me twice..

..ive never tasted revenge, but they say its sweet..each lie you told..each fist you raised..every tear you made me cry..i don't think you're ready for the games im only about to begin..this time..i'll swing right back..

So its the 29th!
I didnt blog yesterday morning because I was WAY too busy with getting ready for the surgery... and plus they called me at 10:30am asking if I could come in for the surgery asap. So we headed to the hospital and I was on the operating table by 12.

Mum and dad came with me. And Erin surprised me with Daisies and magazines and a stuffed puppy that looks just like Angus! Erin stayed with mum and dad untill I came out of recovery, then she left for work.

I peed once and then they let me be discharged at like..4pm? So it really wasnt too bad.

Im not gonna lie. I started crying when they put the oxygen mask on me. The IV didnt even hurt. And I was talking about my piercings and tatts with my main nurse for the surgery. But the second they put the oxygen mask on me. I started bawling. My nurse told me.. "Just pretend your on the beach in Cuba".. "Been there, done that" I said to her. "Well think of that then sweets" She told me. So I remember telling myself over and over.. "Its Christmas, Amanda and I are on the beach in Cuba" (Which is our plan for Christmas anyway). So thats what I thought about while I dozed off.

When I woke up the nurse told me I had been asking for Amanda since the second the breathing tube came out. Ha. They told me there was no nurse named Amanda.. LOL. Then once I woke up abit more I asked for Amanda again and told they that was my girlfriend!! :) Too funny.

So I have some excellent news and I truely believe it is because the prayers and thoughts that everyone sent me!!

The tumour was able to be removed on its own. The doctor was able to save my ovary and my fallopian tube. Thank Goodness!! I have never been so happy. We had orignally thought from the ultrasounds that the tumour was wrapped around the ovary, but the doctor was able to cut the tumour right off. It did get sent away to find out if it was benign or not. So one last hurdle to over come.

Thanks so much for all your prayers, thoughts, and warm wishes.
Im doing well right now! Im in alot of pain, but thats all expected. I have 4 incisions, one on each hip bone, one through my belly button, and one alone my pubic hair line. They all hurt like hell and if Im not taking tylenol and advil every 2 hours I cant even stand straight or walk. So Im definately keeping myself medicated.

I'll also make a pretty cute preggo lady! My stomach is swollen and I look pregnant. But its cute. :) haha.

I'll update in a few days. :)